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Showing posts from April, 2013

The Curse of Beautiful

Today I had the opportunity to sit and talk with one of my students.  Earlier in the year she wrote an essay for my class called Beauty and the Beast, in which she explained in a very heartfelt manner her own perspective about beauty. Her point of view was very focused on finding what is beautiful in people, instead of always looking at someone's appearance.  She is a beautiful girl, and sometimes I've wondered, and judged her, about the depth of her own character.  She showed me a message she received from a male friend that she had sent her essay to. She put a lot of time and effort into her essay and he had returned it with a "kind" but scathing review, particularly of her opinion.  

Though his words reeked of that rhetorical pseudo-maturity so often found clinging to the shirt tails of misguided early twenties university goers - I could tell she felt like she didn't have enough of a point to respond to his argument.  As I read the message over, with her sittin…

To Have and to Hold

Celebrating 65 Years of Marriage
John and Louise, April 1948
We Love You

 There are times I feel like I live in a small, protective bubble.  I'm not a marriage expert, I've only been at it for eight years. I don't have a perfect marriage - I couldn't even really say what that looks like. We fight, we laugh, we talk, we agree to disagree, and I could definitely live without the burping. My husband is my best friend, my soft place to fall, my security. I love him more than Elizabeth Bennet loved Mr. Darcy, when I see him gather our children in his arms, and love them and hug them and breathe them in. If the words I love you were currency, we'd be millionaires, and we are - in more ways than one.  

But, recently I have connected with people who's views of marriage are drastically different from my own.  It is their cage, their battlefield, their nightmare.  Marriage is supposed to be a sacred, safe, loving place, and these problems between husbands and wives seem to …